Hi! I've been reading forums for 3+ months and trying to decide what to buy. I've gotten various quotes and just don't know if I'm being sold what I need, especially due to all the conflicting info the local salesmen have given me.

My well water test results:

Hardness: 17-20
pH: 7
Iron: 4-5
TDS: 605
Nitrates: 0

Other info:
High tannins, slime in toilet tanks. Things get rust-like stains. Low to no sulfur smell sometimes. Sometimes other smells such as rusty, fishy, garbage. I did a test to see the output of the well, and I get between 2.5 and 3 gallons of water filled between the pump turning on and it turning off again. The pump runs for 5 seconds. I read that was how to determine flow rate, but it doesn't really make complete sense to me. Now, this could all be moot due to my pressure tank being bad, so if I need a properly working pressure tank to figure out flow rate, please let me know.

My primary concern is the iron/rust problem as, but I do want a properly sized softener to get the hardness down to something under 5 I guess.

There are only two with possibility of children. We do 5 loads of laundry and three dishwasher runs per week.

Old equipment is on it's last leg. Iron filter is bypassed- Autotrol 255 with 9x44 greensand for iron. Smaller softener with Autotrol 255. I just downloaded the manual for the Autotrol and will look into adjusting the softener's settings. System is softening well enough on a 4-day cycle after I cleaned up the valve, but still getting Iron stains. Water is less smelly now.

Please help me determine what I need. Just softener? Softener & Iron (please tell me I can use something other than potperm effectively)? More equipment? Would it be worth rebedding the stuff I have now, perhaps replacing the valves?

Info from salespeople:

Online: $2,600 for softener, iron, chrorine injector, new pressure tank (mine is not holding pressure, Wellmate brand)
Local: $1,700 to $2,100 for a softener (I think 1.5 cubic foot) with resup + $200 for new pressure tank. Or $3,400 for softener, iron, u/v thing, new pressure tank, and undercounter r.o.

I don't know what proper pricing is, but I'd like to get the right thing for what I need, and be able to service it myself. I am worried that I'll buy something and it won't be enough, then I'll have to add something else and now I've messed up the water flows or the efficiency of the fist system due to having to add things. Or, I've bought too much stuff and needlessly wasted money.

I've gotten some good info from this and other forums and have a general idea of the available tech, just not so sure about the Iron filters and which is best for my situation.

Thank you for your time and any assistance. Please let me know if there is specific information that is still needed.