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Thread: Let me explain life to you.

  1. #1

    Default Let me explain life to you.

    On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

    The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

    So God agreed......

    On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

    The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

    And God agreed......

    On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

    The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

    And God agreed again......

    On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

    But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

    "Okay," said God. "You asked for it."

    So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

    Life has now been explained to you.

    There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.

  2. #2
    Senior Robin Hood Guy Ian Gills's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007


    Thank you.

    It's simple good manners.

  3. #3


    Ian, it was a joke. Do you understand a joke?

  4. #4
    DIY Junior Member wmills's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by Cookie View Post
    Ian, it was a joke. Do you understand a joke?
    He left the biggest joke across the pond Cookie.

  5. #5


    For the women here or the woman in your life:


    I hope you will get a chuckle out of this one!
    This person lives at my house!!!!!
    But, I'm sending her to live at your house
    because she is annoying the heck out of me..

    Click here: _Who_ (http://www.bittybitznpieces.com/WhoIsShe.htm)

    What lies behind us, and what lies before us

    are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

  6. #6


    I don't know how smart this is to do, since, I have no sound on my laptop, but, I was able to lip read most of what she was saying, .. let me know, if I missed anything that was inappropriate... This is Maryann...

    oops wrong URL, lol... that was about a drunk scottsman,

    I think this is it,

    Much better watching Maryann than wondering about that drunken scottsman who one first place in the kilt contest.
    Last edited by Cookie; 02-21-2011 at 03:33 PM.

  7. #7

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