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Ian Gills
08-23-2010, 11:45 AM
After living here for six years now, I had the shock of my life yesterday when I was having a Burito lunch at a Mexican restaurant.

I looked around and saw that each and every American would cut up their food with their knife first, before taking the fork in their right hand and eating the lot.

Me, I sat there with a knife in my right hand and a fork in my left. Cutting and forking the food into my mouth as I went along.

Like this:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyuC950XCTI

So why can't you guys eat nicely? Didn't your parents teach you any manners?

asktom
08-23-2010, 01:12 PM
Knife and fork for a burrito? Must be one of those big juicy fake ones. Where I come from, to eat a burrito you pick the dang thing up with one hand and chomp into it. That leaves a hand free to squeeze lime into your Corona bottle.

Cookie
08-23-2010, 02:43 PM
So why can't you guys eat nicely? Didn't your parents teach you any manners?

You mean like this?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u48PvBTl3u8


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u48PvBTl3u8

Ian Gills
08-23-2010, 03:28 PM
How did you lot ever get past your first date?

Yes, I did use a knife and fork to eat a Burrito.

If I ever have a daughter and you have a son old enough to date her and he took her out for a meal and ate like y'all, I'd chase him away with a shot gun.

Manners.

Cookie
08-23-2010, 04:06 PM
Away? It would quite be the opposite, he'd be your son in law in no time flat.

hj
08-23-2010, 05:08 PM
You are describing a British and European style of eating. We disassociated ourselves from them a couple of centuries ago. WE do not have to cut with one hand and eat with the other, because we are not in a race to get done first. I'll bet you eat your peas with a knife also. And it has taken you SIX years to notice this? And at a Mexican restaurant at that. You must not eat out very often.

johnjh2o1
08-23-2010, 05:52 PM
This guy should be on everyone's ignore list. He is on mine.

John

Ian Gills
08-23-2010, 07:34 PM
Thanks John. I've sent the friends request.

wmills
08-24-2010, 02:52 AM
lol John I just enjoy the satire he presents. No one could worship such an inbred family such as his royals. Their genes are too low to mix with the gene pool.

Ian Gills
08-24-2010, 05:09 AM
This is not about the Royals (for once!). It's about being taught to use a knife and fork when eating in the company of others. It seems to have passed most of America by.

asktom
08-24-2010, 08:07 AM
I also eat fish and chips with one hand, leaving the other free to operate malt vinegar and ale containers as necessary.

Ian Gills
08-24-2010, 10:11 AM
I cannot believe it. It is possible to temporarily stop eating to consume beer, you know?

As an act of protest, I have just been to one of my favorite restaurants.

Here is the menu, and is one of the very few things (and I will admit) makes the good ol' US of A great:

http://www.cheeseandburger.com/

You just don't get stuff like that anywhere else.

Anyway, I ate an entire burger, onion rings and coleslaw continental style. Yep, even the onion rings were consumed using a knife and fork. I did this to show respect for those American diners around me. They, however, just used their hands instead. Disgusting, and at a place of fine dining too.

asktom
08-24-2010, 07:41 PM
You know, Ian, when you are standing at that board running down the wall shoving cod down the hole in your face, shoulder to shoulder with the middling sort, it is best to keep a grip on your brew lest the slacker next to you try to hook it. Oh sure, you could slap his wrist with your fork when he goes for it, but that is unseemly. No, better just to keep it safely in hand.

Cookie
08-24-2010, 08:45 PM
I bet you have a hard time cutting up your soup. ;)

Redwood
08-29-2010, 11:45 AM
Anyway, I ate an entire burger, onion rings and coleslaw continental style. Yep, even the onion rings were consumed using a knife and fork. I did this to show respect for those American diners around me. They, however, just used their hands instead. Disgusting, and at a place of fine dining too.

You did that with a spork at McDonalds? Amazing!

ballvalve
09-23-2010, 10:41 PM
After living here for six years now, I had the shock of my life yesterday when I was having a Burito lunch at a Mexican restaurant.

I looked around and saw that each and every American would cut up their food with their knife first, before taking the fork in their right hand and eating the lot.

Me, I sat there with a knife in my right hand and a fork in my left. Cutting and forking the food into my mouth as I went along.

Like this:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyuC950XCTI

So why can't you guys eat nicely? Didn't your parents teach you any manners?

After a lot of time in Europe it became evident that Americans really are idiots at eating. Always switching hands - silly.

But I use the hybrid method of fork in right hand and knife in left hand, and the Europeans never notice my reversal, and you don't put food up your nose by accident that way, since the important work is the fork hand, which SHOULD be the right hand.

Terry
09-25-2010, 11:18 PM
It doesn't matter which hand holds the fork.
Half the time I eat with my left, and half with right. I don't even think about it.
I can also do left handed lay-ins all day long until they force me right, which is fine with me.
When I plumb, I normally use both hands at the same time, but doing different things.
When play guitar, I use both hands,
I also bat both left and right.
What's your point anyway?

Ian Gills
09-26-2010, 08:49 AM
In Europe it definitely matters which hand holds the fork, even if not noticed.

Etiquette is to hold it in the left.

Even for left handers or ambidexrous people like Terry and my brother.

Redwood
09-27-2010, 08:40 AM
Etiquette in a Mexican restaurant...
Thats funny right there...
I usually drive away from the window unwrap it from the paper, hold it in my hand and eat it...

Ian Gills
09-27-2010, 09:36 AM
It's called respect for those around you Redwood.

ballvalve
09-27-2010, 10:18 AM
Switching hands is just inefficient and messy. Use two hands but use the ones that work best for you. Most Americans would fork that burrito into their eye with a left hand stab.

Basement_Lurker
09-27-2010, 02:29 PM
It doesn't matter which hand holds the fork.
Half the time I eat with my left, and half with right. I don't even think about it.
I can also do left handed lay-ins all day long until they force me right, which is fine with me.
When I plumb, I normally use both hands at the same time, but doing different things.
When play guitar, I use both hands,
I also bat both left and right.
What's your point anyway?


.... and still further evidence that Terry is actually a plumbing robot. The conspiracy grows.

Redwood
09-27-2010, 02:58 PM
It's called respect for those around you Redwood.

There is no one around me...
I left the drive up window...

Why would you go inside a Mexican restaurant?

Ian Gills
09-27-2010, 03:06 PM
To meet Mexicans.

It's called, "getting out and about".

The only place you might wish to stay in your car is Ireland.

Or places where the Irish moved to. Like potato farms.

Cookie
09-27-2010, 03:57 PM
I might be too lazy to go check or sometimes, the posts are just too boring, but you I think, never answered how you eat soup with a fork?

Ian Gills
09-27-2010, 04:51 PM
OK, OK. I use a soup spoon. But there is etiquette in using this too, which also has been missed on Americans.

Because your mummy and daddy didn't teach you. Which means etiquette was forgotten on the Mayflower, although I happen to believe that it never boarded.

PS I know you always check these posts Cookie.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5m2gMM1rt70

Cookie
09-27-2010, 05:35 PM
lol. Sometimes, I do. Not always. I usually always check the posts about fixing something I know little about, which is alot, lol. Because I am studying to become certified to home inspecting houses. Now, I am a licensed RE agent so, it can go hand-in-hand. I am also, a licensed appraiser. Houses I know about. Plus, I am on the computer when I am not doing either of those 2 because I write 2 columns in magazines, and numerous other things, so, inbetween thoughts, I read here on the funny threads for some R & R. I laugh at alot of yours. :)

Question: How do you eat a Snicker's Bar?

Ian Gills
09-27-2010, 07:14 PM
Deep fried.

You should try the nachi forum for home inspectors. There are always some interesting posts there.

Redwood
09-27-2010, 10:12 PM
To meet Mexicans.

It's called, "getting out and about".

It's not exactly fine cuisine...
Although the Gringo Corporation Chain Restaurants might pass a health department inspection...


The only place you might wish to stay in your car is Ireland.

Or places where the Irish moved to. Like potato farms.

I could understand them wanting to bloody your nose...
Like so much of the world already has...
How many colonies have you been kicked out of now Ian?

Cookie
09-28-2010, 05:20 AM
Actually, well acquainted with Nachi.

Now, I want a deep fried Snickers bar for breakfast to go with my bag of M&M's, topped with a big coffee. I will drink my coffee with my right hand.

Do you use a knive & fork with that Snickers bar?

Ian Gills
09-28-2010, 01:16 PM
How many colonies have you been kicked out of now Ian?

Personally, none. Although I have lived in two, including the United States, and both treated me well and rightly recognized me as their old master.

It's all "Yes Sir" and "No Sir" at immigration and a nice long-term working visa to boot. No problem. But then I wouldn't expect one. I'm just coming home to survey the land and see how you guys have been keeping the place.

The answer to that, of course, is not very well. Bridges falling down. Gas pipes exploding. etc. etc.





Do you use a knive & fork with that Snickers bar?

If in the company of others, absolutely! That's just good manners.

Cookie
09-28-2010, 02:29 PM
Now, for dinner tonite I made my own dish of sauteed ( in crackling garlic oil) onions, green peppers, hot peppers, squash, red spuds, cut up tomato, fresh basil, fresh oregano... over a bed of rice... question, how would you eat this?

Ian Gills
09-28-2010, 04:36 PM
With a knife and fork at a properly set table. Use the knife to squidge the meal onto the fork.

Cookie
09-28-2010, 05:39 PM
No, you would eat this very quickly because it is oh, so good... and, then want more.

or... you could take your time and let each mouthful taste great.

ballvalve
10-08-2010, 11:13 AM
With a knife and fork at a properly set table. Use the knife to squidge the meal onto the fork.

Brits eat popcorn with a fork and spoon too?

Or avoid it for fear of no proper instructions for transfer to mouth "properly"?

Ian Gills
10-08-2010, 12:58 PM
We eat that with our hands........in the dark at the cinema.

I ate another buritto the other day with a knife and fork. The other American diners around me must have thought it was a magic trick, using a knife and fork at the same time.

Redwood
10-08-2010, 02:02 PM
Sounds like you either drastically overpaid for your meal or, you looked awful silly sitting there in the parking lot....:D

http://www.masterthebusiness.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/image25.png

Ian Gills
10-08-2010, 03:03 PM
Actually it was one of these.

And it was full of Americans using their fingers.

http://www.retroplatesystem.com/projectimages/chipolte2.jpg

ballvalve
10-09-2010, 02:33 AM
Looks like detention hall in my catholic high school, with the sprinkler heads or tear gas dispensers lowered to head height.

I would stick to the pseudo english pubs to relax. Greasy old wood and brass.

Good on you to adopt one American abberation of popcorn groveling.

Redwood
10-09-2010, 05:40 AM
Actually it was one of these.

And it was full of Americans using their fingers.

http://www.retroplatesystem.com/projectimages/chipolte2.jpg

Is that a school cafeteria?

That would explain a soggy slimy burrito that you couldn't pick up....

Now when I think about fine dinning i usually associate it with a place that looks like this....

http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f2/Redwood39/avitars%20and%20emocons/51ff340f.jpg

or, this...

http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f2/Redwood39/avitars%20and%20emocons/559c6251.jpg

Definitely not a school cafeteria eating soggy burritos...
Those are something you grab for a quick belly filler at a fast food joint...

Fine dinning usually entails enjoying things like...
Paupiette of Sole stuffed with Maine crabmeat and fresh herbs with a light mustard cream...
Roast Sirloin with braised onions and sweet wine demi-glace
Ginger Crusted Salmon Fillet with baby shrimp and lemongrass sauce soy caramel
Orecciette Pasta tossed with grilled shrimp, fire-roasted peppers, mushrooms and garlic cream

A bunch of overcooked reheated beans in a flour tortilla just doesn't make the grade....

By the way in 1814 some of your fellow countrymen saw fit to use the place in the 2nd photo as their headquarters until they were sent packing by a bunch of farmers...
Hard to imagine a well trained army allowing that to happen but it did....

Ian Gills
10-09-2010, 05:43 PM
Yes, yes Redwood very nice. And I do enjoy eating at places like that too.

The only difference being I use all the cutlery when I do because my mummy and daddy taught me how to (we didn't live on a farm). Unlike you and your American cohort who use your fingers or, if it's a really classy night out, a fork.

And we let the farmers have it Redwood. They were fellow Englishmen after all. Wish we hadn't now I'm back and seen what mess you've left the place in, but we can't change history....only the future.

Now, which bridge shall I fix next?

And those power lines are going under.

That American Standard toilet can stay though. At least they got one thing right!

Redwood
10-10-2010, 12:44 PM
Yep...
I can tell the manners your parents instill in you Britt's...

http://nbcsportsmedia4.msnbc.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/060624/060624_englandFans_hmed_3p.standard.jpg

ballvalve
10-11-2010, 11:02 PM
Yep...
I can tell the manners your parents instill in you Britt's...

http://nbcsportsmedia4.msnbc.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/060624/060624_englandFans_hmed_3p.standard.jpg



I saw that on the news: That guy was caught in a Kentucky fried chicken joint in London eating right out of the box with his fingers. foolish devil. Got what he deserved!