Just for the fun of it.

[Cass]

My wife and I had words...I just didn't get a chance to use mine.

__________________________________________________ ____

I dialed a # and got the following recording:

"I am not avaliable right now, but thanks for careing enough to call. I am making changes to my life. Please leave a message...If I don't return the call you are one of my changes."

__________________________________________________ _____

I was always taught to respect my elders, it just keeps getting harder and harder to find one!

__________________________________________________ _____

Lifes irony is that when you're old enough to know your way around, your not going anywhere.

__________________________________________________ _____

Once you finally become a big wheel, all you do is go around in circles.

[hj]

Or as I read yesterday;
The wife ALWAYS has the last word in an argument. Any further discussion starts a new argument.

[GrumpyPlumber]

A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran
into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her
lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband
said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain
stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."
*~~~~*
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and
the other is a husband.
*~~~~*
My wife and I go out to dinner once a week...
She goes Fridays, I go Mondays.
*~~~~*
"I tried to open the door to my house with my car keys once....took the house for a spin, parked on the highway and told everyone to get off my lawn." (Steven Wright)
*~~~~*
An agnostic, dyslexic, insomniac lay awake one night...
Pondering the existence of a Dog.
*~~~~*
Anyone hear about the psychic midget that escaped from prison last night?
He's a small medium at large.
*~~~~*
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a
very sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do
anything you want."
He tied her up and went golfing.

[Cookie]

If you want your spouse to listen and pay full attention to what you have to say, talk in your sleep. ( and fall asleep on command)